But time went by and I found out a thing or two
My shine wore off as time wore on
I thought that I was living out the perfect life
But in the lonely hours when the truth begins to bite
I thought about the times when I turned my back & stalled
I ain't no nice guy after all
When I was young I was the only game in town
I thought I had it down for sure,
But time went by and I was lost in what I found
The reasons blurred, the way unsure
I thought that I was living life the only way
But as I saw that life was more than day to day
I turned around, I read the writing on the wall
I ain't no nice guy after all
I ain't no nice guy after all
In all the years you spend between your birth and death
You find there's lots of times you should have saved your breath
It comes as quite a shock when that trip leads to fall
Friday, October 29, 2010
I ain't no nice guy after ALL
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 11:02 PM 0 comments
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Citer yg aku copy tp sama ISI
citer nie aku x wat...tp terbaca kat page member..hehehehe...syes TERBAEK... walaupown x wat tp isi citer nie mmg sama la dlm hati wakakakaka bace tau ehemm2 Kehadapan my future wife(s) I menulis article ini bukan lah kerana di cabar oleh seorang member yang ingin melihat keromantikan I. Tapi.. err.. I ...menulis ini adalah kerana kehendak I. So, sila baca entri ni perlahan-lahan. Tak perlu laju-laju. So, wahai my future wife(s) I don't know who the hell are you and I have no idea where you are right now. But one day, bila kita dah berjumpa, I harap you mampu terima I seadanya seperti mana I akan terima you dan diri you sebenarnya. Lagi pun, I tahu yang you ni memang comel. Dan baik. Dan rajin. Dan alim. Dan cun. I berharap bila I check facebook you nanti, you tidak letak banyak gambar you yang daring-daring kat facebook. Sebab, setahu I, kalau perempuan tu comel, mesti nak tunjukkan ke seluruh dunia. Macam lah dia sorang je yang comel. I comel tak ada pun letak gambar kat facebook tunjuk ke seluruh dunia. Boleh je hidup. Ehem. Serta, gambar di facebook tu, jangan lah nak dedah sana dedah sini. Malu I. You pun tau kan, perempuan ni ibarat cokelat Ferrero Rocher. Bila berbalut dengan pembalut, even cokelat tu jatuh kelantai pun orang still nak. Tapi kalau dah tak berbalut, bila jatuh ke lantai, semua buat dono. Ada tu, kalau boleh, ada yang nak pijak lagi. You pun tak nak kena pijak kan? Lagi pun, you tahu, tak ada lelaki di dunia ni yang nak kahwin dengan perempuan yang seksi meksi. My future wife(s), I tak tahu pasal masa depan I. I tak tahu berapa banyak duit yang I akan ada. So, dengan kata lain, I mungkin tak akan mampu kasi rumah 10 tingkat kat you. I juga mungkin tak mampu kasi you 10 emas intan berlian. Harap you tak kisah dengan diri I yang tak beharta ni. Tapi kalau setakat kasi you 20 hingga 30 anak tu, I okay je. Dalam tiga tahun, kita mungkin akan ada 2 anak. Tapi tu tak termasuk yang kembar tau. Bila kita ada rumah nanti, I tak kisah kalau you nak bekerja. Tapi lagi bagus kalau you duduk je rumah jaga I. I bukan mintak di layan bagai raja. Tapi kalau I balik dari kerja tu, apa salahnya tanggalkan stokin I, urut bahu I, sediakan minum-minum I. Tapi kalau you tak nak buat, tak apa. I boleh tambah lagi 1 (cukup 2). Lagi pun, bila I tambah lagi 1, kurang la sikit beban you. See? I memang prihatin. Hmm. You tau, I tak mengharapkan yang you adalah gadis lemah lembut dan ikut semua kata I. Kalau you boyish sikit pun apa salahnya. Aggressive itu menarik. Kalau boleh, lebihkan kat bahagian mengada-ngada dan keras kepala you tu. I suka. Senang la I nak ajak bergaduh kalau macam tu. Sebab kalau di ikutkan, I tak suka perempuan yang lemah lembut sangat. Nanti tak meriah rumah tangga. So kalau skali skala bergaduh, best juga kan? Lagi pun, kita gaduh siang-siang je, bila dah nampak katil di malam Jumaat, kita berbaik lah. Tambahan pula, bagi kita, setiap malam kan malam Jumaat. My future wife (s), You, I harap you reti memasak. You mesti reti memasak. Apa? Tak salah kalau perempuan tak reti masak? Ya. Memang tak salah. I tak kata pun salah. Tapi jangan salahkan I kalau I tambah lagi 1 isteri (cukup 3) sebab yang satu dan dua tak reti masak nak buat macam mana kan? Okay tak-tak. I tak nak bini 2,3,4. Banyak sangat. bukan tak mampu. Tapi... Ehem. Actually, I bukan mintak you masak macam makan kat hotel. Asalkan you reti masak yang simple-simple sudah lah. You tau, air tangan masakan isteri lah yang buat si suami setia. Lagi pun, tak akan setiap hari kita nak makan kat restoran kan? Kalau setiap hari makan kat restoran, baik I kahwin je dengan mak cik tukang masak tu. Ye tak? You pun tak nak kan I tambah lagi satu (cukup 4) kan? I harap you reti jaga diri sebelum jumpa I. Kalau boleh, jangan couple banyak-banyak. Tak pernah couple lagi bagus. Tapi kalau dah couple tu, jangan buat yang bukan-bukan dengan boyfriend you. Bila dating tu, jangan nak mengada-ngada keluar berdua. Boyfriend you tu bukan boleh percaya sangat. Kebanyakkanya adalah buaya. Sebab kalau dah lelaki, mesti bermulut manis. Boys, their mouth is bull****. So, don't trust them. Akhir kata dari I, bila kita kahwin nanti, you masak, I makan. I imam, you makmum. I baca doa, you aminkan. You merajuk, I pujuk. Perfect, kan? So cepat lah cari I. I takut lah nak cari 'you'. Takut tersalah pilih perempuan lain. You pun mesti tak nak jadi isteri ke dua I kan. best x? BAeknyer
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 10:51 PM 3 comments
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Pesanan Atok SedareKU
Smalam aki man tdo kat mah atok aku, huhuhu
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 4:22 AM 2 comments
Sweet RAYA 'O' Mine
SELAMAT HARI RAYA
Al-Kisah,
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 1:31 AM 2 comments
Thursday, August 26, 2010
SongOfmyH(U)(EA)rt
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 4:58 PM 0 comments
The Truth.....Almost Easy
the Truth is.....
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 12:41 AM 0 comments
Monday, August 23, 2010
Korang Pernah Buat x??
99 things to do in an elevator
Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
Sell Girl Scout cookies.
On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
Shave.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
One word: Flatulence!
On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
Do Tai Chi exercises.
Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
Give religious tracts to each passenger.
Meow occasionally.
Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
Leave a box between the doors.
Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
Start a sing-along.
When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
Shadow box.
Say "Ding!" at each floor.
Lean against the button panel.
Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
Bring a chair along.
Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
Blow spit bubbles.
Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
Make chalk drawings on the walls.
As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, dammit!"
Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.
Find a crowded elevator and pace back and forth inside it.
Walk in, face the back and go about two inches from the back wall.
Walk in, and start reciting a shopping list in monotone.
Stand right in front of the doors when waiting to get on. (This gets a good reaction from the people inside.)
Once inside, stand right in front of the doors, waiting to get out. (This gets a good reaction from the people waiting to get on)
Wait til the door is almost closed then pry the doors apart with a painful expression on your face.
Sing anything by Guns 'n' Hosers while pantomiming the lyrics. (I love her but I had to kill her, would be good)
Ask, "Did you feel that?"
Look at the ground while standing in the corner and moan softly.
When the doors close, look at the person next to you and yell, "Your nostrils they're like wind tunnels, SUCKING UP ALL MY AIR!" Then scream and collapse, when the doors open, get up and calmly walk out.
Comment one by one, on the clothing of all the people riding in the elevator.
Push the emergency stop button and say "Now it's time for you all to DIE! Just kidding." restart the elevator.
Wander from corner to corner of the elevator during the course of the journey.
Hit every floor button, and at each floor get out and say, "Nope, this ain't the right one." Get back on and ride to the next floor. Repeat.
Explain to some poor innocent stranger all about the complex dental work you supposedly received. Get them to look in your mouth and everything.
Tell some poor sod your complete life history completely out of the blue.
Ask for advice on a completely disgusting problem.
Get a vote from the entire elevator about some completely pointless issue.
Say, "Omigod, did you hear that?" And look completely panicked while not uttering a single intelligible word.
Sit in the corner and meditate. "Ohm."
Pick up the emergency phone and try to order pizza.
Run like hell while the security guards try to find you to kick you out. (This can be applied to all)
Wear an earphone with the cord inside your jacket, carry a walkie-talkie. Once inside the elevator, stop it and say. "Williams FBI, I need to see some ID. Look at everybody's ID restart the elevator and talk into your walkie-talkie saying, "It's ok he's not on this one. But we think he did manage to find bullets for his gun."
Say to an older lady "My you've got nice hair." Pull out a pair of scissors and look suggestively at her.
In a foreign accent say "You are very beautiful." to a young girl. Pull out some money and say "How much to purchase you?". Indian accents work well for this, like the guy on Short Circuit.
Do all of these things with a friend, while both of you are wearing trench coats and dark glasses.
When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock.
Smile, and go back for more.
Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on
Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After awhile, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
Move your desk in to the elevator and whenever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
Swat at flies that don't exist
Tell people that you can see their aura.
Call out, "group hug!", then enforce it.
Talk in to your cell phone as you enter on the ground floor press floor 5 and when the door closes, in a shock voice say "what do you me there a gun man on the fifth floor?"
hahahahha....bnyak gak yg penah aku wat dlm list nie...
harap korang leh g tahu ape yg korang wt
Posted by NAZMI SCHIFFER at 5:02 PM 2 comments